book club review #1: captivating

A friend of mine just recently decided to start a women's book club with a few friends.  It was put on her heart to open her home once a month for a group of women to come together to encourage, learn and grow in our relationship with Jesus.  I had mixed feelings at first, one this sounds great and two where am I going to find the time.  Going into the new year I told myself I wanted to read more.  So maybe this was opportunity to make it happen and have the accountability I needed.  I know it's a matter of prioritizing my time.   We came together and decided on five books for next few months till summer.  I think we have a good variety of books that will hopefully elicit good conversation and connection.  

Last night we meet to discuss our first book, Captivating: Unveiling the mystery of a Women's Soul.  I already had the book and started the book when we were first married but never finished.  The story of my life.  Sorry couldn't resist.  So I was excited to read through the whole thing.  However I found the book overall basic and not as profound as I remembered it.  Maybe it's because six year ago I was in a different place.  Or maybe because I already knew the premise of the book.  Either way I was really looking for some depth and reflection on my soul.  It did have a good reminders for sure ... as women we seek out beauty//we want adventure, romance and to play the princess//we have wounds from growing up that make us who we are today//our relationship with our fathers and mothers are crucial in how we see ourselves and other//God needs to be the one we are truly passionate about and seek after.

This is one of the passages that spoke to my heart ....

God wants to love this life together with you, to share in your days and decisions, your desires and disappointments. He wants intimacy with you in the midst of the madness and mundane, the meetings and memos, the laundry and lists, the carpools and conversations and projects and pain.  He wants to pour his love into your heart and he longs to have you pour yours into his.  He wants your deep heart, that center place within that is the truest you.  He is not interested in intimacy with the women you think you are suppose to be.  He wants intimacy with the real you.  

This was a good reminder and nudge for me to be in relationship with God in everything.  Not just the highs and lows but in the everyday.  And that is hard.  Among the potty training, runny noses and tantrums.  Finding joy in the everyday can be a struggle.  We long for adventure and excitement.  But instead of going to others or things, go to him first.  That is where the intimacy and joy and love will be the deepest.  He wants our time, our thoughts and our actions.  Why is it so hard to give them up?  Control really is something we make up + do to feel good temporarily but he is calling us to be our real selves = true intimacy that will heal and fill our hearts.  We are relational women so why not have the most fulfilling relationship with our Lord and Saviour who is longing for us to run to him.  To do life with him.  And by doing this, it takes the pressure off our husbands to meet our every need and the unrealistic expectations on our friends and family to be something they aren't meant to be.  Only Jesus, our Lord and Saviour will not disappoint us.